Do you want truly passionate and desirable sex with your mate? Sex that doesn't simply bring you closer together but rather creates anticipation of your time together? You can let yourself go in your sexual relationship with your spouse once both of you feel completely and totally valued.

And it's not just about letting yourselves go and making it a choice, in fact, what you will learn, is that once the relationship is secure enough and your love strong enough, you will naturally want to open up to each other in new and exciting ways. What is true love? What does it feel like? What does it sound like? Can we every really attain it?

These are important questions to ask yourself and to ask about your marriage and sexual intimacy together. If you're not asking these questions, you probably don't believe it's possible or maybe you have given up on ever truly feeling loved.

Feeling valuable is about understanding what it takes to reach the ultimate pinnacle of your emotional life and sexual life. Love and sex are inseparable. You can't have great love without great sex and you can't have great sex without great love.

What happens to you when your spouse hurts you? What happens when your marriage isn't exactly where you hoped it would be? As a couple, you want to be continuously growing closer together. The old saying is true; if you're not getting better you're getting worse. There is no such thing as a static relationship. You're either growing or dying.

Focus all of your attention on creating a relationship that is safe, secure, and open. You won't have to guess when you've created this type of relationship, it will be obvious in your sexual experience with each other. As your sexual lives mature from passion, to intimacy, to desire, the mere thought of each other eludes to erotic and fantastic ideas of how to further increase each other's joy of sex.

Take a look at these five steps to creating desirable sex:

1. Love is ready to arise when your spouse feels most valuable
Take a look at the most significant mathematical statement in our modern era, Albert Einstein's E=MC2. But I bet you didn't know Albert's true love was Mileva Maric. "If only you were with me! We understand so well each other's souls, and also drinking coffee and eating sausages, etc." His mathematical formula just may have been one of the greatest pick up lines in history!

2. True love grows through the hardships of life
Statistics show that despite conflicts, married people are generally happier, live longer, and contribute more to society than those who remain single or leave a spouse.

3. True love can journey with the companion of pain

4. True love is from the source of all fire
Robert Russel was at a man's fiftieth wedding anniversary and he said, "Ken, fifty years is a long time." Where Ken immediately responded, "Not nearly as long as it would have been without her."

5. True love is too priceless of a gift
What can you give to attain love? You can give yourself. Nothing creates more passion and desire than giving yourself freely to your spouse.

To find articles, books, and conferences from Amy & Michael Smalley go to: http://www.amyandmichael.org/default.aspx?pid=30

© Copyright 2006 Smalley Relationship Center

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