Brian spent a lifetime seeking his father's approval. His father wanted him to be the best and the brightest, and Brian tried—how desperately he tried! And when his father lay dying, Brian flew across the country to be by his bedside and plead one last time, "Please say you love me, please!"

Perhaps you know someone like Brian. Maybe you've walked in his shoes. Our emotional and psychological makeup is such that we all need what the Bible calls "the blessing"—the knowledge that someone in this world loves and accepts us unconditionally. Because our parents are so important to us during our formative years. We especially crave their blessing and are hurt if we don't feel we have it. But this lack can also be felt between brothers and sisters or husbands and wives, or even within a church.

The Blessing is an important study, by Drs. Gary Smalley and John Trent, of an easily overlooked but powerfully effective concept for families and professional counselors. In their years of counseling, they've successfully used the concepts outlined here to heal hundreds of broken hearts and families. The Blessing will even offer peace and healing to those men and women who no longer have any hope of receiving their parents' blessing.

It is a remarkably simple, logical process, one that touches both inner spirit and physical body, one that teaches in a step-by-step manner how to be a blessing and how to pass that life-changing blessing on to your parents, spouse, children, and friends.

There are five elements of the blessing: 1) meaningful touch, 2) the spoken word, 3) the expression of high value, 4) the description of a special future, and 5) the application of genuine commitment. And, in vivid, true-life examples, they describe the five most common home situations where a blessing has been denied. These could be the homes of people you know and love. One of them could even be yours.

© Copyright 2003 Smalley Relationship Center

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