Q: How come it always seems to be that the man has to do all the work in a relationship? How come women are not told to learn about men, and learn how to communicate to their husband? It seems to be all for the women to have it the way they want. Sounds very one sided.

A: I think the simple answer is because men are asked to be leaders. We get to lead our families in how to communicate, learn from others, and serve. When men are truly seeking growth in their relationship with the Lord and their marriage, everybody wins.

In all of my years of counseling couples I have met very few women who did not respond to the genuine efforts and growth in their husbands. Here's a little secret. Women have a built-in marriage manual. They know the difference between when a husband is doing the right things for the right reasons and when he doing the right things for the purposes of getting something or his own way.

Many husbands make the mistake of waiting for their wife to change before they make a move towards change. Don't wait for your wife to change. You can start today by becoming a student of your wife. Don't worry about what she is learning or doing. You worry about your growth. Be the leader.

Blessings!

© Copyright 2007 Smalley Relationship Center

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