A leader is a person who has followers. That may sound simplistic, but it's a practical definition. People follow a leader because he or she can help them get to where they want to go, because they admire something about him, or they value her character.

One way to investigate whether you have leadership qualities is to think about two or three people you would follow in almost any situation or circumstance. These are the people you trust the most. Circle the qualities in the list below that make you willing to follow them. Then use the same list to measure yourself. Underline those areas in which you would like to grow.

compassion
preparation
faithfulness
organization
problem solving
servanthood
empathy
enthusiasm
nonjudging
listener
motivational
deep prayer life

Leaders Are Learners. A leader never stops learning about people, about the world and how it's changing, and about leadership itself. Leaders never stop reading books, listening to tapes, and going to conferences, seminars, and workshops; when they do, they regress. How do they find the time? Rather than making giant commitments, effective leaders commit twenty minutes a day. In the space below, list four areas of leadership you'd like to learn more about. Then pick the priority topic, find a book about it, and spend twenty minutes a day on it. When you're through with that one, begin another. It's amazing what you can learn in a year by reading just twenty minutes a day.

Leaders Are Listeners. It seems everybody wants to talk, but few want to listen. Yet leaders are listeners, and there are secrets to becoming a powerful listener. Listening doesn't mean simply not talking. It means giving feedback that lets people know you've heard what they said, or paraphrasing to show you understand.

Several listening skills are listed below. Check the qualities you would like to develop.

1. ____ Notice nonverbal information (facial expression, eye contact, posture, mannerisms, and how close or far away the person stands or sits from you).
2. ____ Listen for the intent as well as content. Listen not only to words but to the thought, depth of feeling, personal meaning, even the meaning that is below the conscious intent of the speaker.
3. ____ Give verbal hugs—affirmation—while listening. Interject, "Yes," "Really?" "How interesting," "I hear you."
4. ____ Be comfortable with silence.
5. ____ Be nonjudgmental.

Leaders Are Developers. Leaders want to see people grow and develop to their full capacity. They're not afraid to let others move on to bigger or better things, and they don't need people to help them look good. Leaders try to help people identify goals and reach out to achieve them. In small groups, leaders develop other leaders by getting to know their goals and aspirations, and by knowing their weaknesses and what can be done to help them overcome or minimize their impact.

Developing co-leaders in small groups will make the difference in growing groups that touch more lives for Christ. How to begin?

1. Pray daily for them.
2. Publicly recognize them when they make significant contributions.
3. Check on them regularly to learn about their personal needs, to pray with them, and to answer their questions about leading a group.

Leaders Are Encouragers. Harvard psychologist William James said every human being's greatest need is the need for appreciation. If a leader is quick to point out when we do something wrong, we feel smaller, more alienated, and far less likely to follow that person than before. But how we bloom when someone shows us genuine appreciation!

Set a goal of paying one sincere compliment a day to someone you know well. Remember, the most meaningful compliment is one that relates to something a person has done. Praise calls attention to something for which a person is responsible; flattery calls attention to something for which they are not responsible.

List three people you could encourage this week:

Leaders lead individuals, not groups. Each person has individual needs, and effective leaders know that what motivates one may not help another. One person might grow by being given a task and left alone to do it. Another's personal style may require specific instructions. There's nothing wrong with either approach; they're just different. So understand each individual: How do they like to get information? Do they like a lot of facts, figures, and details? Do pictures and diagrams help? How much time do they need to prepare for change? Do they need pressure so much that they delay things until the deadline? Do they work best when given a long lead time?

There are four styles of learning—what, why, how, and results. A leader must be prepared to motivate every type represented in a group.

Which type are you? (Some people are a combination of more than one.)

1. ____ What is primarily concerned with information. Likes memorizing, word studies, and working with reference books.
2. ____ Why is primarily concerned with personal meaning. Likes to be personally involved, interact with others, listen, and share.
3. ____ How is primarily concerned with application. How does it work, and how can it be applied? Likes to try things for himself.
4. ____ Results is primarily concerned with action.

Leaders Are Investors. Jim Elliot, who lost his life serving as a missionary to the Auca Indians in South America, penned these words as a student at Wheaton College: "He is no fool who gives up that which he can never keep to gain that which he can never lose." I believe developing others is one of the best investments of our time—an investment that we can never lose.

List one person you would like to disciple in the six qualities of a leader and eventually move into a position of co-leadership.

© Copyright 2005 Smalley Relationship Center. Used by permission.

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