One of my favorite things about children's ministries is seeing all the "firsts": the first time a two-year-old hears the Easter story; the first time a child sings "Jesus Loves Me." But one of the most powerful "firsts" is when a child experiences real Christian fellowship.

At Menlo Park Presbyterian Church, we wanted our kids to know there was a place they belonged—a place where they could talk about the things that mattered to them. So we designed a small-group program for kids called Inside Scoop. Eventually "Scoop Groups" became very popular. A number of our kids considered it the highlight of their week. They learned to be honest and care for one another. For many, it was their first taste of Christian fellowship.

Group Format

A Scoop Group is for children in fourth through sixth grade. These one-hour small group meetings follow a basic format: Gathering/greeting, snacks, a few minutes discussing how everyone's day went, prayer to open (one child prays), icebreaker introduces the topic for the night, discussion/activity, sports, and group prayer requests (one person prays for each request).

Not Just Any Leader Will Do

With small groups for kids, you need outstanding leaders who can draw kids out and handle a discussion that may end up anywhere—who, in fact, like to take crazy tangents. It takes people who can be sensitive to new things God is doing and still keep a group on target. One place to start looking for this kind of leader is among the young adults and college students in your church.

Designer Curriculum

Finding the right curriculum for your leaders is also a stretch, but don't give up. More and more products are coming on the market. Seven years ago when we started our Scoop Groups, we wrote our own curriculum. It works best for us to let kids and leaders design what they talk about. When leaders ask what their kids want to discuss, sometimes a spiritual topic comes up, but usually children want to talk about popularity, music, clothes, and sports. Don't be discouraged; these topics are great springboards for learning Christ's values.

Commitment and Confidentiality

Most of the kids in our program have grown up in church. They think they've heard it all. Inside Scoop groups provide time for them to think about biblical principles they're familiar with and apply them to issues they face at school and home. We talk about everything: family relationships, movies, competition, self-esteem, anger, etc.

The right curriculum and the right leaders are very important. But the kids themselves must be committed. Most have no idea what they are in for. At the first meeting, their expectations rise as they find out how rare this kind of group can be. Kids need a place to talk, to be respected, to belong and be loved. In that first meeting, they establish a three-point covenant:

(1) Confidentiality (define it), (2) Respect for one another (reflected in the amount they talk and their attitudes), and (3) Honesty (tell the kids they can talk about what is foremost on their minds). This covenant needs to be rehearsed several times throughout the year. The hardest point for kids to internalize is to respect one another. It takes weekly reminding and modeling.

When kids get involved in small groups at an early age, their desire for and commitment to small groups continue through adolescence. A small group can give a child support and encourage growth and accountability. But most of all, a small group models Christ's love and acceptance when they need to know it most.

© Copyright 2005 Smalley Relationship Center

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